What therapists think about social media

and how they use it to therapise themselves

We all know how divisive spending ever-growing chunks of our lives glued to social media platforms like Instagram is - the commentary is never-ending: its impact on mental health, its algorithmic bias, and its addictive nature which can lead to isolation and decreased social interaction.

Research directly links smartphone use and mental health issues, the focus on likes and followers contributing to anxiety and depression, and girls aged between 17 and 19 are most affected. Its encouragment for users to present a curated and often unrealistically shiny or envy-inducing view of their lives can easily become a means through which teenagers think about themselves, affecting self-confidence and ultimately resilience.

All of these things are true, yet I’m reminded constantly of how, like many things in life, it depends on how we harness its powers - WE have choices. A recent trial found that encouraging girls who predominantly followed fashion, beauty and celebrities to follow high-achieving and aspirational women instead led to them feeling inspired and energised, with a positive effect on self-worth.

In relating to these successful women, conversations shifted from: I can’t! to: I might, I could and I CAN!

I’ve always encouraged my clients to follow inspiring and supportive creators on Instagram, of which there are many, anxiety_wellbeing being a key player with 1.5 million followers. Its messages are simple, promote self-kindness and are largely expressed through wonderfully accessible cartoons.

I woke in the night recently, went for a pee and couldn’t get back to sleep. I know very well what’s prone to happen - those peri-menopausal night-time awakenings taught me how readily the head enjoys waking up and searching out any worries, real or (usually) imagined, whipping them up into a storm. Next, I’ll worry about how I won’t get back to sleep and before I know it, my stomach’s joined in with a knot of anxiety like a mild sense of dread. Thoughts latch on to Big Life Events: the renovation project we’re undertaking, conflicting thoughts about retirement. What if my book never finds a publisher? All of which has receded and taken on a healthier perspective again in the morning, yet my head’s left a bit fuggy and I carry a faint concern of ‘what if I wake up and can’t sleep again tonight?’

But later that afternoon, I opened up Instagram to see a post by someone called Abbierosie, whom I follow. The message: ‘BUT WHAT IF IT ALL WORKS OUT!!!’ was beautifully illustrated, and accompanied by the message:

‘Here’s your little evening reminder to try and focus on the good and turn your worry into excitement for the future’.

This message came along at the right time; it felt, in that moment, as if it had been put there especially for me. My heart did a little leap, and I felt like someone had shown me a kindness, and soothed a worry away.

This is exactly the way in which so many of the clients I’ve worked with could benefit from social media if only they harness it in the right way to support themselves. There’s sooooo much out there, we just need to step up and decide who we want to follow and who isn’t really contributing to our well-being.